An addled mind

I have posted little in some time. Depression will do that. I have been reasonably functional, but nothing has been able to hold my attention long. My responsibilities at work drains me of energy, leaving little to care about other pursuits. This isn’t too far from the normality of my life for some time, just more marked than before. I don’t live, but only exist from day to day. Not a life, but just being present in this world.

Times like this are interminable; just getting through from one day to the next is a struggle. I cannot concentrate, possess no energy, and very little sense of care for anything in my life. I have had no appetite, but eat because it is a necessity. Beyond that, I have mindlessly consumed things that are poor fare and inadvisable for an overweight, out of shape diabetic. Knowing that I need to change these things flies in the face of lacking any care or concern for myself and well-being.

The mental destruction caused by both my depression and anxiety seems everlasting. Slower on the uptake now with a failing memory I am left wondering if mental illness has left brain damage. There is a soft spot in my life for those who suffer from mental illness, particularly those whose stories are similar to mine. Even though I have little care remaining, I endeavor to give support and succor to others. Being concerned of others helps me to feel better. Contrary to who I have been in the past, I want to do what I can to do good by others.

Thanks for stopping by and hopefully you return or read some of my past posts of thoughts, poetry, or fiction. It would be pleasant to know that I may be a helpful influence or entertaining one to you. Be kind to yourself and take care, darlings.

One thought on “An addled mind

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  1. Im there pretty much too. I’ve gained back all the weight I lost. I have a project to do but can’t get myself to do it. Feeling sick and tired all the time…. anyway. I hope you can push through and get on the better side of all this…I hope we both do. Sending love and hugs and prayers.

    Liked by 1 person

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