My self-esteem has plummeted at work. I continue to make basic mistakes over things that I should be remembering. It has become painfully apparent that I am not up to the challenge of human resource work. It is agonizing every time that a new problem arises. How do you adequately explain that your brain is faulty? That I have had life-long issues with my memory and it is getting worse? I was so excited when I began, and likewise at the prospect of new challenges, but all of this became overshadowed by my failings.
I want to succeed and remain terrified of the impact of my mental health on performance. Fears like this rule me, even reaching some levels that it can overwhelm the medication. I hit a sudden plummet in mental health yesterday around lunch, hitting a brief, deep depression. I like to be a useful person, but I feel like such a burden. It’s a new obstacle to overcome, but I have yet to figure out how.
I’m not sure that I have it in me, but I’m going to try and make a post daily this month. I missed yesterday, so another post today would be in order. Thank you for stopping by as always. I hope you come back again, but I’m not everyone’s cup of tea. Take care, darlings, and be kind to yourselves.